Pregnant or new to Parenthood?
Need some tools to manage the transition? 4thought psychology
provides information and confidential support in a safe space for new and expectant parents. Our objective is to Build Confidence for Parenthood by providing: Emotional, Psychological and Relationship Preparation for New or Expectant First Time Parents |
Clients can benefit from:
- Knowledge about the emotional and relationship issues that commonly arise around the time of pregnancy and birth of a new baby OR
- Personalized counselling around issues relating to the transition to parenthood.
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• Understand the transition to parenthood • Cope with losses related to parenthood • Deal with “Mother-guilt” • Manage expectations versus reality of parenthood • Be assertive as a new mum or dad • Manage negative, unhelpful thinking patterns • Create awareness around how family relationships change when baby arrives • Manage and optimize psychological health including postnatal depression • Mindful Parenting and Attachment |
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Here are some of 4thought's Top 5 Favourite Tips to help care for Mum's and Dad's emotional well-being:
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Rest is not Idleness
Taking time to recharge your batteries is a priority- whether this be half an hour sitting alone in the sun or grabbing a coffee and reading the paper, regular planned and “in the diary” time to yourself is essential. If babysitters are too expensive and extended family are not around, try a roster system with close friends or neighbours with children where you take turns to give each other a break. |
Manage the Guilt
Often guilt is of the unhealthy variety- this means that we feel we are to blame for something we didn’t actually do wrong. Guilt is often anger or sadness in disguise- ask yourself: do you feel angry or sad and if the answer is yes, then deal with the issue at hand. If we reframe our guilt as regret, we feel more at ease as there is no longer an element of blame.
Go Easy on Yourself
We mums can be really hard on ourselves- we sometimes set ourselves unrealistic goals and then when we are unable to achieve them, beat ourselves up. Be a friend to yourself and understand and accept your human limitations. Striving for perfection is a sure recipe for failure.
Often guilt is of the unhealthy variety- this means that we feel we are to blame for something we didn’t actually do wrong. Guilt is often anger or sadness in disguise- ask yourself: do you feel angry or sad and if the answer is yes, then deal with the issue at hand. If we reframe our guilt as regret, we feel more at ease as there is no longer an element of blame.
Go Easy on Yourself
We mums can be really hard on ourselves- we sometimes set ourselves unrealistic goals and then when we are unable to achieve them, beat ourselves up. Be a friend to yourself and understand and accept your human limitations. Striving for perfection is a sure recipe for failure.
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Stop Competing
Live in your own comfort zone- do what feels comfortable for you without comparing to others. There will always be someone who looks like they are doing it better than you. Mums can be competitive at times- we all have value to add but in our own individual, unique and diverse ways. Playfulness and Joy Something to look forward to like a short break with the family or a fun activity is what keeps all of us going at times. Not everything for our kids has to be educational, serious or healthy- let’s break the rules once in a while, ok? |
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Useful resources for new and expecting parents
- PANDA - Post and Antenatal Depression Association (Tel: 1300 726 306)
- Breastfeeding Helpline (Tel: 1800 686 2686)
- Maternal and Child Health Line (Tel: 13 2229)
- Family Relationship Advice Line (Tel: 1800 050 321)
- Pregnancy, Birth and Baby Helpline (Tel:1800 882 436)
- Suicide Line (Tel: 1300 651 251)
- Lifeline (Tel: 131114)
- Mensline (Tel: 1300 78 99 78)
- Beyond Blue (Tel: 1300 651 251)
- Playgroup Victoria (Tel:1300 651 251)
- www.mokshayoga.com.au (Perinatal yoga)
- www.naturallycalmbirth.com.au (Sue Power is an independent midwife and childbirth educator)
- https://ellytaylor.com/the-book/ (A great resource written by Counsellor Elly Taylor to help couples transition into parents)
- www.birthwellbirthright.com (Lamaze Childbirth Classes)
- www.pregnancy.com.au (Helpful website for new and expectant parents)
- www.fitwise.com.au (Physiotherapy antenatal and postnatal)
- www.babysittersandmore.com.au (Babysitters and More for the perfect local babysitters, nannies, cleaners, personal carers, housekeepers and other home helpers)
- https://www.roganfamilycare.com.au/ (The Nanny Specialists)
- http://research.healthtalkaustralia.org/early-parenthood/overview Website containing video and audio-recorded 'real-life' stories of 45 Australian mothers' and fathers' emotional experiences of becoming a parent. Hear from single parents, older and younger parents, parents of twins, parents through surrogacy or adoption, same-sex attracted parents, parents who experienced perinatal depression, pre-term birth, multiple miscarriage or death of a baby, and mothers and fathers from diverse cultural and socioeconomic backgrounds.
- http://www.birthhub.info/: Great resources for Melbourne parents and parents to be.
- www.partnerstoparents.org : Giving couples the tools and info to stay connected, parent as a team, and look after their health when they become parents. Backed by research and totally free!
